Pillow Talk

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A book review of Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations About Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker

A book review of Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations About Sex for Married Couples by J. ParkerStars: *****

HHH Books (2019)
212 pages

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. This post contains affiliate links.

Summary: How can you experience sizzling and satisfying sex in your marriage if you can’t even talk about it? Yet couples often struggle to understand their spouse and discuss their sex life. Getting the conversation started can be awkward, create more confusion, or result in conflict.

Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples provides the right framework for productive communication on a myriad of issues, from physical health to building trust to sexual fantasies. Pillow Talk teaches you how you to ask questions, listen, and converse in a way that will avoid argument and promote understanding and intimacy. Each chapter introduces a topic, presents questions to ask one another, outlines a biblical viewpoint on the subject, and concludes with active steps to help your progress sink in.

From bestselling Christian sex author, blogger, and podcaster J. Parker, of Hot, Holy & Humorous, Pillow Talk will help your marriage bed move from awkward to amazing.

Pillow Talk

This is another book from the author of Hot, Holy and Humorous which I reviewed recently.

In this book, the author gives 40 different personal conversations you should have with your spouse when the time is right and you are alone to help improve your marriage and your sex life. This isn’t something to rush through. It’s not for you to talk at your spouse about. It’s for you to talk and listen to each other together.

First some ground rules are given and should be discussed such as choose a good time and place, be vulnerable, listen and stay calm.

Then for each chapter, the topic is given and then there is an ask and listen section with 3 questions that you should each (unless otherwise specified) ask of each other and fully listen to the answers. Then there is a read and consider section which shares related bible verses for you to read together and then some knowledge to be shared from the author for you to read together as well. Then a Touch and Pray section which helps you pray about that area of your marriage. Finally there is a Go and Do section with ideas to specifically do to make that topic better in your lives or to work through any issues that might have come up.

For example, the topic “Pursuing Your Spouse” has you ask questions like “Tell me about a time when you felt I really desired you and how it made you feel?” or “How could I better show that I desire all of you, including sexual intimacy with you?” The Read and Consider talks about how we should pursue one another as Jesus pursues us and the Go and Do section includes this as one of it’s items: “Make a list of five ways you can flirt with your spouse this week…”

I found a lot of these topics I’ve already discussed with my husband but that’s because we’ve always been very open and discussed hard topics fairly easily. I feel like many couples have not discussed these topics and that this book would be of great use to them.

I can’t use these topics with my husband in the full way intended as he is not Christian so going over bible verses would not appeal to him. If you are in a situation like me though, I still think you could benefit from the book as you could still make time to discuss the topics and do the Ask and Listen and Go and Do sections.

The only “bad” thing I have to say about the book is that the Go and Do Sections don’t look like they say Go because of the font. That’s not enough to bring it down from 5 stars. I loved this book and highly recommend it.

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About Kathleen

I've been a nonfiction lover for as long as I can remember. I love children's nonfiction as well and love to share my knowledge and the books I gained them from, with the world. I wish more people would give nonfiction a chance.