The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

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The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman

5 Love Languages by Gary ChapmanStars: *****

I received this book as part of a tour but it didn’t arrive in time and then I kept putting off writing the review for some reason.

Summary: Dr. Gary Chapman guides couples in identifying, understanding, and speaking their spouse’s primary love language—quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch. By learning the five love languages, you and your spouse will discover your unique love languages and learn practical steps in truly loving each other. 

The copy I received is actually a special leather-bound copy, of which amazon says: “This beautiful leather edition is the perfect gift for weddings, holidays, or any special occasion. Includes a promotional code to gain exclusive online access to the new comprehensive love languages assessment.” Just a quick reminder that while it was a nice surprise to receive this nice edition, it has no bearing on how I rate or review the book.

I truly believe The 5 Love Languages should be required reading for all couples who intend to get married. Most of the marriages that end in divorce might have been saved if the couple had read and implemented the book.

The author has deduced that everyone has a love language. Some of us may fall under more than one category but we should all have one that we are more like. The Five Love Languages are:

  1. Words of Affirmation (I Love You, You’re Beautiful, etc..)
  2. Quality Time (Doing things together while talking  – not watching TV together in silence.)
  3. Receiving Gifts (Flowers, Chocolates, etc..)
  4. Acts of Service (Doing dishes/laundry, child care, fixing leaky basement etc..)
  5. Physical Touch (NOT Sex – massage, hand holding, touching arm while talking etc..)

Gary Chapman explains that your love language is the way that one knows that he or she is loved.  For example while I might enjoy a gift from my husband, I’d much prefer him to do some work around the house or take care of the kids (Acts of Service.) If my husband showered me with gifts and said I love you all the time but never did anything for me, I’d wonder if he really loved me. For you it may be different.

The problem is, most people try to do their love language to show their love to their partner. However if his/her love language is different from yours, they may not be feeling the love. If you want words of affirmation but your husband wants quality time and you only give words of affirmation, he’s not going to feel loved. If he gives you mostly quality time but no words of affirmation, you aren’t going to feel loved.

The book is amazing and the author has created many different versions of the book as well
such as The Five Love Languages:

  • Men’s Edition
  • of Children
  • of Tenagers
  • Singles Edition
  • of Apology

Plus he has some other books related to love languages, marriage, and more.

The author is a Christian and mentioned God once or twice but more in regards to responding to a client who talked about God. It’s never preachy and you don’t have to believe in a God or the Christian God to get use from the book.

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About Kathleen

I've been a nonfiction lover for as long as I can remember. I love children's nonfiction as well and love to share my knowledge and the books I gained them from, with the world. I wish more people would give nonfiction a chance.